Sometimes we come on this forum simply to be able to vent our anger. We are not after, we sometimes certainly do not need pages of advice from people who seem to spend more time giving voice to their own particular vengeance than anything else . If what you get for being honest is a belly full of criticism it is hardly surprising that people stay clear. PD is a bugger of a condition and more than anything we either need gentle support or clearly accessible facts.
Merker,
if you do not feel better for coming on this forum there is something wrong. There is not one of us who does not feel for your situation deeply you have to be proactive and decide what is important. Love is love, family is family, duty is duty and PD is a bitch.
Keep going.
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Merker.Is the heart of the matter the fact you are really frightened? You sound frightened to me,panicky even. You have seen your uncle with Parkinson's,now your mum and you fear you will be next.All this angst seems to me to be you not knowing how to face up to your real fear. You fear having Parkinson's and nobody there to help and support you. Is that right? You need help.Go to your G.P as a first port of call and and be honest with him/her.
Genius.
yup, I find that sarcasm really helps.
Hello Merker, I have been with you since you first told us your predicament. I feel you all need someone from outside the family with some care experience to give you some practical support without interfering and upsetting your Nan. I agree with previous post that if you have a sensible GP you should go and speak to him. I had an occupational therapist who came and did not interfere but advised on making life easier in the house. She would know about showers and bathrooms. You could ask your GP about this. It would be for him to arrange.
Having been a carer, I do not think it is feasible to cater for every whim of your Mum such as more animals. Your Mum is still not happy even after she gets them. We know that ill people can become very selfish and demanding.
No wonder you are worried about getting PD, the situation must be depressing and you see everything black. You are a young man not a woman with a maternal instinct. I can see you are doing your best.
Having been a carer, I do not think it is feasible to cater for every whim of your Mum such as more animals. Your Mum is still not happy even after she gets them. We know that ill people can become very selfish and demanding.
No wonder you are worried about getting PD, the situation must be depressing and you see everything black. You are a young man not a woman with a maternal instinct. I can see you are doing your best.
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Ray: that comment is just the sort of comment that stops people posting. It is just down right rude. I am not going to get into a conflict with you . It does not annoy me but, if it happens again I will just complain to the moderator.
I shall complain to the moderator ,not because I need her support as I am quite able to look after myself, but because this sort of behaviour is destroying the forum and needs to stop.
Merker, I slightly overlooked that your Nan doesnt want or refuses help. Another angle strikes me, maybe your Mum also needs help. Would she be prepared to speak to her GP about her worries?
Hi Merker
I dont come on this forum very often these days but have just been reading your thread. Im sorry for all the stress that you and your family are under.
I have one small suggestion re the guinea pigs. Do you know of any children living locally that might like to earn a bit of pocket money? Perhaps one of the neighbours has a young teenager who could come in and look after them for you. I know that my daughter (who is 13) would enjoy a job like that.
All the best.
Carrot
I dont come on this forum very often these days but have just been reading your thread. Im sorry for all the stress that you and your family are under.
I have one small suggestion re the guinea pigs. Do you know of any children living locally that might like to earn a bit of pocket money? Perhaps one of the neighbours has a young teenager who could come in and look after them for you. I know that my daughter (who is 13) would enjoy a job like that.
All the best.
Carrot
ECG, aren't you being a tad inconsistent? One minute you're advocating freedom of expression, with zero moderator intervention, the next you want to complain to them about every slightest irritation. Chill.
Please find me and copy and paste the piece where I said I wanted little or no moderation.
You did mean me ,I presume you pressed the wrong button.
So you DO "want to complain to them about every slightest irritation", then?
I asked politely if you would show me by cutting and pasting where I said I wanted little or no moderation.We were not discussing my level of tolerance.
Ray,
at the risk of seeming churlish, do you get a kick out of being so thoroughly obstructive? If yes, may I suggest that you need another forum.
Let us ,the majority, continue with non-menacing and supportive posts. In case you hadn't noticed, it isn't just about you.
mrs.t.
at the risk of seeming churlish, do you get a kick out of being so thoroughly obstructive? If yes, may I suggest that you need another forum.
Let us ,the majority, continue with non-menacing and supportive posts. In case you hadn't noticed, it isn't just about you.
mrs.t.
Merker is being a kid thats all, I understand hun. My kids would step over my lifeless corpse to get some biscuits out the cupboard. Give him a break hes 24 x
Why have you gone silent,Merker.
Sorry I have been quiet but I have been really busy with everything and havent had a second to stop by.
Just to show EXACTLY how unselfish I have been I found out not so long ago my girlfriend is pregnant. She lives quite a distance away. The ultimatum I was left with which was what she wanted was for me to move away from my home and live with her/bring up the child as a family.
I know exactly what commitment I put in at home and how I dont want to see my mum go downhill quicker than its going to happen. It was a long and difficult decision but what swung it for me was knowing I would be far from home, I wouldnt be able to come home much at all, my nan wouldnt be able to cope on her own and I couldnt live with myself being that far away and finding out when I come back to visit that something has happened to my nan or my mum has got a lot worse. I have said no to that chance.
Its a situation where my mum feels ashamed, she wouldnt want to ask for any extra help and would make out shes fine to do things until the very end.
It is very true though. With everything going on I dont get time to look after the guinea pigs. My nan has to do a lot of it and has said she cant actually cope with them and feels like shes getting even less of a life now. Guess what though? my mum is now talking about getting more or breeding them. It just shows that nobody should have everything their own way because when you give in and let them have their own way even after expressing how you dont think its right they will push for more and more (take the expression "give an inch and they will take a mile")
Id say at the time of posting it was an off day. We have those in the house now and again but more often than not all things are good here.
I would say there could be some fear of getting PD in later life. That fear started 5 or so years ago so now I dont tend to think about it as much. I just try to get on with everything and then cross the bridge if it happens
Just to show EXACTLY how unselfish I have been I found out not so long ago my girlfriend is pregnant. She lives quite a distance away. The ultimatum I was left with which was what she wanted was for me to move away from my home and live with her/bring up the child as a family.
I know exactly what commitment I put in at home and how I dont want to see my mum go downhill quicker than its going to happen. It was a long and difficult decision but what swung it for me was knowing I would be far from home, I wouldnt be able to come home much at all, my nan wouldnt be able to cope on her own and I couldnt live with myself being that far away and finding out when I come back to visit that something has happened to my nan or my mum has got a lot worse. I have said no to that chance.
Its a situation where my mum feels ashamed, she wouldnt want to ask for any extra help and would make out shes fine to do things until the very end.
It is very true though. With everything going on I dont get time to look after the guinea pigs. My nan has to do a lot of it and has said she cant actually cope with them and feels like shes getting even less of a life now. Guess what though? my mum is now talking about getting more or breeding them. It just shows that nobody should have everything their own way because when you give in and let them have their own way even after expressing how you dont think its right they will push for more and more (take the expression "give an inch and they will take a mile")
Id say at the time of posting it was an off day. We have those in the house now and again but more often than not all things are good here.
I would say there could be some fear of getting PD in later life. That fear started 5 or so years ago so now I dont tend to think about it as much. I just try to get on with everything and then cross the bridge if it happens
My goodness,Merk,If I read your life in a book I would not believe it.You really have got some problems.I hope you are able to support your pregnant girl friend financially
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Well done that man. Keep up the good work. Good luck, and much strength, for the future.
Ray.
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Ray.
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