Thank you for your kind words. This is the most difficult thing I’ve ever had to deal with. Just have to keep strong
How are things now? My mum got diagnosed with parkinsons last august and recently diagnosed with LBD the past week. She only has some symptoms to be honest - for now. No hallucinations. Reading alot of mixed messages online about expected life span etc. i know everyone is different which probably makes it harder.
I don’t think it is an exaggeration to say that it is like being hit by a juggernaut - shocking, traumatic, painful and very hard to come to terms with. In a not nearly so difficult situation I find it very hard to separate myself as carer, from being my OH’s wife, and whilst people urge me to take a break, look after myself etc etc, it is so much easier said than done - and whilst of course that is part of the answer, it doesn’t address much of the difficulty that we carers face, especially the emotional side of things. Are you able to access counselling at all ? May be your GP practice has someone available for that. Or Relate is very good - though they may not be operating at the moment.(I have been waiting for an appt since March) I think that could be helpful - if only to express how you feel in a neutral, non judgemental situation, and to work through those feelings, with no strings attached, which there often are when one talks to friends or family.
It doesn’t always help, but sometimes it can, to think of that invisible army of other carers who are in the same or a very similar boat to you - they know what it is like - you may not be able to see them or talk to them but they are there, and rooting for you - just like you do for them. And knowing that you have done the best for your husband. Medals don’t get handed out but I am sure you deserve one.
warm regards, Pippa