I'm afraid so Suzy, only enjoyment/relief i'm getting out of life at the moment is when i am no longer conscious. I lay awake and the moment i fall asleep i awake again until the point comes when i pass out for the night.
When i come round in the morning I feel tired as if i have gained nothing from being asleep,except being switched off, i take my pills, not because i think they'd do me any good, it's just because i'm told too and it's a routine that passes the day into night,
What i'm given too take i don't think has any bearing on my illness anymore,or effect on it, codiene for pain, propranolol for tremor and amitriptiline for nighttime (i can be bothered too spell you get the jist) i get pain now beyond pain and fatigue beyond just being tired.
I am running on empty waiting too be refuelled by my next appointment with the Neuro if it ever turns up, i almost think it's some sort of game the gov play's too keep the ill waiting hanging on a thread, where hopefully he'll put a label on this god awful experience And some proper Meds,
Although i doubt him a little and the line he's gone down, it might just as well have M.S