Paranoia or what?
At times like this we get a little suspicious, particularly of newbies. So apologies in advance if I offend.
Phil L you've done your homework well, to make the link to number 2 required a bit of reading of recent posts. But number 1, that requires going back 6 months, so very well done. Just thought you'd get your feet under the table before discussing our dirty linen. Are there not more pressing things you'd like to discuss?
Littlejulie - sweet name - strange you been a member for nearly a year, no posts, but you PM me. My dilemma is if I reply you get my email address....... but thanks for the kind words.
Phil L and Littlejulie, as I said, apologies if I've got the wrong end of the stick, paranoia is part of being a Parkie.
Grey.
What a shame if anyone does get banned for life. PD is for life, isn't that enough?
Of course if the threads or content (phraseology) upsets anyone for any reason)then that is different, that is why I reported myself and asked for one of my posts to be removed because I could not live with the added stress of causing another human being especially a lady and someone offering support any distress, emotional or other wise.
I like to think no matter how low I feel or whatever depths of distress I sink to and believe me I am down right now, I would not want others to join me because of what I write, say or feel, but I would hope to be allowed to reach out for help and get some, other than from my long suffering family. I get it from you guys and God bless you all for that, so whilst I agree with the comments on the previous postings on this and other subjects, I would say, we all, no matter what still have to bear in mind the rights and feelings of others to express their feelings. Perhaps if unsure it would be wiser to get someone to read the posting before hand, but let's remember the beast we are either suffering with or living with.
To err is human to forgive is divine, I think the saying goes.
I hope one day I can accept my lot in life, move on , be grateful for what I have and have had prior to PD and maybe find peace again, all I know is at the moment it is b......, hard. God bless one and all and here's hoping for a brighter tomorrow.
Of course if the threads or content (phraseology) upsets anyone for any reason)then that is different, that is why I reported myself and asked for one of my posts to be removed because I could not live with the added stress of causing another human being especially a lady and someone offering support any distress, emotional or other wise.
I like to think no matter how low I feel or whatever depths of distress I sink to and believe me I am down right now, I would not want others to join me because of what I write, say or feel, but I would hope to be allowed to reach out for help and get some, other than from my long suffering family. I get it from you guys and God bless you all for that, so whilst I agree with the comments on the previous postings on this and other subjects, I would say, we all, no matter what still have to bear in mind the rights and feelings of others to express their feelings. Perhaps if unsure it would be wiser to get someone to read the posting before hand, but let's remember the beast we are either suffering with or living with.
To err is human to forgive is divine, I think the saying goes.
I hope one day I can accept my lot in life, move on , be grateful for what I have and have had prior to PD and maybe find peace again, all I know is at the moment it is b......, hard. God bless one and all and here's hoping for a brighter tomorrow.
Paranoia or what? continued
I've read over my previous post on this thread and part of me says I shouldn't have written it, or at least not in the way it came out.
It is no sin to be a member of a forum and not contribute. Equally it is not sinful to send a private message, a few kind words about a poem I posted to another thread. I should have let my over inflated ego rule the day, accepted the praise and responded in the normal manner. I have now done so with unreserved apology; email winging its way through the ether. Littlejullie, welcome to the forum.
Phil L. I now believe him to be the OH of a regular here. He has met Poker (#2) and has a lot of respect for the man behind the name. I know this because I have been told it by his spouse! So limited apologies, your entrance was a tad clumsy. And, Phil, welcome to the forum.
Best wishes,
Grey.
I've read over my previous post on this thread and part of me says I shouldn't have written it, or at least not in the way it came out.
It is no sin to be a member of a forum and not contribute. Equally it is not sinful to send a private message, a few kind words about a poem I posted to another thread. I should have let my over inflated ego rule the day, accepted the praise and responded in the normal manner. I have now done so with unreserved apology; email winging its way through the ether. Littlejullie, welcome to the forum.
Phil L. I now believe him to be the OH of a regular here. He has met Poker (#2) and has a lot of respect for the man behind the name. I know this because I have been told it by his spouse! So limited apologies, your entrance was a tad clumsy. And, Phil, welcome to the forum.
Best wishes,
Grey.
Hi All
I met a few people from this site in Statford Upon Avon. I was anticipating a bad time with a number of people who had been abusive to each other, thankfully ,I couldn't have been surprised at how well people appeared to get on. People should take responsibility for opening their own private messages, if it is from someone they do not get on with , THEN DO NOT OPEN IT. If you think you wil be offende d likewise.
We have one enemy in common and that is Parkinson's disease.
Words can make or break a person
reading between the lines you might be able to read the pain and anguish PwP experince.
Would like to see everyone get on but, life is not like that.
take care all
Tina x
I met a few people from this site in Statford Upon Avon. I was anticipating a bad time with a number of people who had been abusive to each other, thankfully ,I couldn't have been surprised at how well people appeared to get on. People should take responsibility for opening their own private messages, if it is from someone they do not get on with , THEN DO NOT OPEN IT. If you think you wil be offende d likewise.
We have one enemy in common and that is Parkinson's disease.
Words can make or break a person
reading between the lines you might be able to read the pain and anguish PwP experince.
Would like to see everyone get on but, life is not like that.
take care all
Tina x
I bet 1 is loving all this attention.
Please don't stir ECD,
I think this subject has been well discussed, and I personally am hoping for a fare decision to be made.
Roz
I think this subject has been well discussed, and I personally am hoping for a fare decision to be made.
Roz
I am certainly not trying to stir. I am sorry if it was interpreted in that way.
We have gone round and round but we really have not solved the problem of people being banned and then returning to repeat their bad behaviour, what should be done about it? Additionally, what about the lurkers(I think that is the right term) who are too scared to make even an initial posting for fear of abuse.It is easy enough to stop private E mails but much of this has been in the public domain.Short bans seem to be useless.
Actually ECD if we are talking about the 2nd of the two life bans , then no he is not enjoying life at all. #He has withdrawn from any correspondance with anyone on the site. When he came to Stratford he had said to me that the forum was his "branch" his "support group" and i believe he used "lifeline". So i am afraid we have now got a situation that has blown up out of all proportion.
His input and fun and humour are sadly very missed by a lot of people. I have been told that the forum is very quiet without him.
I will stand up and say I miss him a lot.
Take care
Tina x
His input and fun and humour are sadly very missed by a lot of people. I have been told that the forum is very quiet without him.
I will stand up and say I miss him a lot.
Take care
Tina x
I had decided not to post this, mainly because Jackie had read the forum. !!!!!!
But feel that since it has not gone away, I will put my view forward.
Hi Grey, and the rest of the forum,
Grey, sorry I should have come clean to save confusion
I should start with an apology, first to the forum then to my wife Jaylew. (maybe that should have been the other way round )
I have listened to her grumbles, and watched her smile and laugh over things that are done and said on the forum.
She has cried, argued and lost sleep over thing that have been said, and there are times that she has been so frustrated because she feels her hands are tied at times.
You may not believe this, but she does not like to make anybody unhappy, and hates to offend. Although I am sure she does.
She recently told me that Pokermid had been banned for life, so I decided to take a look. Looking back at my comments yesterday, I find it hard to believe I am owning up to them.
What I wanted to say is that I have met Pokermid, Number 2 or Peter, his preferred name at the time.
I found him an exceptionally nice guy, with Parkinson’s that has got him tightly locked in a vice, and the screw is turning tighter every day. We spoke of his compulsive disorder, and the effect that it has had and is still having on his life. It is hardly surprising that he feels passionate about it.
He is a very well read man, and has a wealth of knowledge to share, and I think that’s all he wants to do.
I also have to say that the manner that he sometimes puts his point forward are a little less desirable, and he has a very short fuse at times, and other times is down right rude to people. But the essence of the man is there. The man that wants to help, and advise.
I have read a lot of his posts, and I have laughed, cringed and smiled at some of his antics, and been amazed how he meets things head on.
I realise that he is fuelled by the argument, and he being a brilliant word smith would run rings round most. So how do you stop it,? You don’t argue with him, this is not giving in, it is learning how to handle him.
If I were Peter, I would be furious that people have now come out of the woodwork to criticise him, but would not do it when he was here.
The man calls it as it is, a spade is a spade. I understand that it does not go down very well with a lot of people, but at least you know where you stand with him. So maybe there should have been some give and take here.
I do know that people miss him, and that the forum seems to be lacking without his presents.
I have a lot of respect for this man, and his wonderful wife Janice, and I just hope that I have not offended him by offering my view.
In truth I am a lot more worried about what Jackie is going to say.
I would also like to add that I met Sid, Number 1 or Alan. My meeting was brief, with little or no conversation, so sadly I can not comment. Apart from to add that we all had a great time at Stratford, thanks to the forum and Tina.( she is a brilliant lady )
Now the burning question on my mind is, who is going to ban me first, Jaylew or the forum.?
Regards Phil.
PS
I have been banned from the forum my Jaylew,although she is in agreement with my comments.
Phil
But feel that since it has not gone away, I will put my view forward.
Hi Grey, and the rest of the forum,
Grey, sorry I should have come clean to save confusion
I should start with an apology, first to the forum then to my wife Jaylew. (maybe that should have been the other way round )
I have listened to her grumbles, and watched her smile and laugh over things that are done and said on the forum.
She has cried, argued and lost sleep over thing that have been said, and there are times that she has been so frustrated because she feels her hands are tied at times.
You may not believe this, but she does not like to make anybody unhappy, and hates to offend. Although I am sure she does.
She recently told me that Pokermid had been banned for life, so I decided to take a look. Looking back at my comments yesterday, I find it hard to believe I am owning up to them.
What I wanted to say is that I have met Pokermid, Number 2 or Peter, his preferred name at the time.
I found him an exceptionally nice guy, with Parkinson’s that has got him tightly locked in a vice, and the screw is turning tighter every day. We spoke of his compulsive disorder, and the effect that it has had and is still having on his life. It is hardly surprising that he feels passionate about it.
He is a very well read man, and has a wealth of knowledge to share, and I think that’s all he wants to do.
I also have to say that the manner that he sometimes puts his point forward are a little less desirable, and he has a very short fuse at times, and other times is down right rude to people. But the essence of the man is there. The man that wants to help, and advise.
I have read a lot of his posts, and I have laughed, cringed and smiled at some of his antics, and been amazed how he meets things head on.
I realise that he is fuelled by the argument, and he being a brilliant word smith would run rings round most. So how do you stop it,? You don’t argue with him, this is not giving in, it is learning how to handle him.
If I were Peter, I would be furious that people have now come out of the woodwork to criticise him, but would not do it when he was here.
The man calls it as it is, a spade is a spade. I understand that it does not go down very well with a lot of people, but at least you know where you stand with him. So maybe there should have been some give and take here.
I do know that people miss him, and that the forum seems to be lacking without his presents.
I have a lot of respect for this man, and his wonderful wife Janice, and I just hope that I have not offended him by offering my view.
In truth I am a lot more worried about what Jackie is going to say.
I would also like to add that I met Sid, Number 1 or Alan. My meeting was brief, with little or no conversation, so sadly I can not comment. Apart from to add that we all had a great time at Stratford, thanks to the forum and Tina.( she is a brilliant lady )
Now the burning question on my mind is, who is going to ban me first, Jaylew or the forum.?
Regards Phil.
PS
I have been banned from the forum my Jaylew,although she is in agreement with my comments.
Phil
Hi Phil,
I'm not well today so please excuse me if at times i don't make sense. I also feel wrong in writing about Peter because he's not able to post and put his view forward but because i have respect for him and miss him i will continue. When i first joined this forum i was going through a very difficult time with impulsive behaviour caused by dopamine dysregulation syndrome. Amongst others, Peter very kindly spoke to me about his challenges with impulsive behaviour which helped me to gain an understanding of my behaviour and to get help, for that i am extremely grateful.
I totally agree with you, Peter is a very well read man and i must say i enjoyed the chats i had with him and even my Mark took a liking to him. I agree he is part of the foundations of this forum and yes it doesn't seem right coming on here and he's not here. I miss his posts immensely.
Peter and I have not always seen eye to eye and may have different opinions but i can honestly say with my hand on my heart i have great respect for him and i so wish he could just control his sworded tongue at times. Peter's made me laugh, he's made me cry. He's made me angry and he's made me think. He speaks from his heart and from his mind which often brings on his tongue lashings.
The trouble is what do you do when you're on the receiving end of his tongue because his comments can be very personal and victimizing. I for one would love to see him return but i appreciate how hard it is for the moderators when Peter's broken so many of the forum terms and conditions over and over again. I really don't know what the answer is. It's a great shame.
Cutiepie
I'm not well today so please excuse me if at times i don't make sense. I also feel wrong in writing about Peter because he's not able to post and put his view forward but because i have respect for him and miss him i will continue. When i first joined this forum i was going through a very difficult time with impulsive behaviour caused by dopamine dysregulation syndrome. Amongst others, Peter very kindly spoke to me about his challenges with impulsive behaviour which helped me to gain an understanding of my behaviour and to get help, for that i am extremely grateful.
I totally agree with you, Peter is a very well read man and i must say i enjoyed the chats i had with him and even my Mark took a liking to him. I agree he is part of the foundations of this forum and yes it doesn't seem right coming on here and he's not here. I miss his posts immensely.
Peter and I have not always seen eye to eye and may have different opinions but i can honestly say with my hand on my heart i have great respect for him and i so wish he could just control his sworded tongue at times. Peter's made me laugh, he's made me cry. He's made me angry and he's made me think. He speaks from his heart and from his mind which often brings on his tongue lashings.
The trouble is what do you do when you're on the receiving end of his tongue because his comments can be very personal and victimizing. I for one would love to see him return but i appreciate how hard it is for the moderators when Peter's broken so many of the forum terms and conditions over and over again. I really don't know what the answer is. It's a great shame.
Cutiepie
Quote taken from bb's post - I look forward to member's posts as they used to be, full of information and lots of fun.
I agree!!!
Cutiepie
I agree!!!
Cutiepie
I just wish everyone was here again and the past could be left in the past and we could start afresh. If it wasn't for the past i wouldn't of learned what i have, if that makes sense lol. We've all got a past and through good and bad we've gained experience and helped each other and isn't that what this forum's all about?
Cutiepie
Cutiepie
I must confess I have been a lurker for many years I am a pwp other half and read the forum most days. I have followed the threads of both 1 & 2 who have been banned for life and have figured out who they both are and I think a life ban is too much, I have learned a lot from this Forum a lot of this from no 2. I am in the fortunate position of being able to take out of the Forum the help I need and ignore the rest, even remarks about carers, over the years I have noticed it goes very quiet when no 2 is not around to stir the emotions and I for one dont read the Forum as much. Sorry to go on for a first post but at least ECD has spured me into posting. Hopefully I will only be the first of the lurkers out there to pluck up the urge to post.
suen,
I was a lurker for a long time. The first post is the most difficult. Hope to see more of you on the forum.
Regards
benji
I was a lurker for a long time. The first post is the most difficult. Hope to see more of you on the forum.
Regards
benji
I think the term "lurkers" is not pleasant. Many people visit the forum for a number of reasons both carers and pwp. If you attend any meeting or group you will find those that participate and comment on every item on the agenda and others who prefer to sit quietly and listen. You would not call the latter group "lurkers". There are many reasons people may not post. Probably shyness is the main reason. Some people are far more private than others. It is silly to assume that people don't post due to fear of abuse. As Benji said the first time is the hardest.I have never attended a Parkinson group meeting probably for the same sorts of reasons that forum members are hesitant to make a first post.
Sejvej
Sejvej
I would like to appeal to the moderators to re-instate those members who have been banned for life. I miss pokermid's contributions which were mostly entertaining and valuable. I copped for the hard side of his tongue but soon learned how to deal with it. In one or two incidences, when I was being stupid, he was right anyway!
We have Parkinson's Disease which is enough of a fight without denying access to this means of communication and help.
Now, I'm sure he offended people much more than he offended me - so I am speaking for myself and I accept that others will disagree with my opinion.
However, I will repeat my plea for the moderators to have a re-think.
Lin
We have Parkinson's Disease which is enough of a fight without denying access to this means of communication and help.
Now, I'm sure he offended people much more than he offended me - so I am speaking for myself and I accept that others will disagree with my opinion.
However, I will repeat my plea for the moderators to have a re-think.
Lin
An interesting thing happened to me on Neurotalk, which may act as a guide to us.I made what I considered a valid criticism of somebody's research.I was neither abusive nor rude in any way, but immediately I had a telling off from another member. Now, I do not think debate should be stifled like this, but to a certain extent it tells us a way forward. I feel that we,as members, should be braver and immediately censure what we consider to be inappropriate behaviour from another member.Disapproval by peers,especially friends, can be a very powerful force but it does mean keeping calm and it does mean the majority participating.It means having courage and not being scared to say something for fear of breaking a friendship.
It may be that P.D and/or medication makes impulse control more difficult for some, but it does all PwP a disservice if we keep making excuses for them and treat them like young children who have no control over their actions.
I did not use the word "lurking" in a derogatory way, as I understand, it is computer speak. My grandchildren sometimes say that the things I do are "wicked"which is a compliment.The meanings of words are changing all the time but if I gave offence to those who read but do not post I am sorry.
It may be that P.D and/or medication makes impulse control more difficult for some, but it does all PwP a disservice if we keep making excuses for them and treat them like young children who have no control over their actions.
I did not use the word "lurking" in a derogatory way, as I understand, it is computer speak. My grandchildren sometimes say that the things I do are "wicked"which is a compliment.The meanings of words are changing all the time but if I gave offence to those who read but do not post I am sorry.
ECD
Afraid you are way out of date, I'd guess the term Lurker has been around for two decades, I remember it from the old bulletin board days, going back to the late 80's.
Hands up, I lurk a lot.
I committed the ultimate new speak sin yesterday, referring to my wife as a fitness freak. I now know one doesn't call anyone a freak, no matter what adjective is applied. My teenage daughter took me aside and explained this to me.
Fortunately, my wife took it the way I had intended. But just goes to show how we can hurt without realising it.
Grey.
Afraid you are way out of date, I'd guess the term Lurker has been around for two decades, I remember it from the old bulletin board days, going back to the late 80's.
Hands up, I lurk a lot.
I committed the ultimate new speak sin yesterday, referring to my wife as a fitness freak. I now know one doesn't call anyone a freak, no matter what adjective is applied. My teenage daughter took me aside and explained this to me.
Fortunately, my wife took it the way I had intended. But just goes to show how we can hurt without realising it.
Grey.
Hi Phil,
Thanks for your open response, all understood.
Hope you don't have to spend too much time in the dog house, I'll put in a plea on your behalf next time I communicate with her you obey.
Apologies on my part for tetchy response to you.
Best wishes.
Grey.
Thanks for your open response, all understood.
Hope you don't have to spend too much time in the dog house, I'll put in a plea on your behalf next time I communicate with her you obey.
Apologies on my part for tetchy response to you.
Best wishes.
Grey.