Confused


#1
Hi, My Mum was Recently diagnosed with PD, It's been hard especially because i am away from home a lot as i am at uni. I am not really sure on what i can do. Did anyone else freak out?

#2
Hi - I am 49 & diagnosed a couple of months ago. Both my daughters live in Australia, so I had to break the news to them by telephone. My eldest Daughter broke down in tears & wanted to come home to comfort me. I explained to her that I was still the same person as I was the week before the diagnosis & there really was no point in her coming home. I really don't want my condition to affect their lives and I'm sure your mum will feel the same! She will want you to carry on with your Uni & live life to the full, I know she will just be grateful of your support when you are able to give it. I hope this helps if only just a little! Kind regards Buddy Girl

#3
Dear Sciencegirl,
I think buddygirl has given excellent advice. A diagnosis of Parkinson's is a terrible shock to the whole family. It is obviously a shock to the person who is diagnosed so its easy to underestimate the effect on close friends and family especially if they have to live away.
Parkinson's is usually a slow changing condition. It will have been present for a while before diagnosis. As buddygirl says your mum is basically the same now as she was before dx.
Lots of people freak out when a diagnosis hits the family. Feel free to ask questions here or use the Parkinson's UK helpline. It is there to help people affected by Parkinson's not just PwP.
I hope that helps

EF

#4
Sciencegirl

With you being at Uni .... I'm guessing your Mom's in her 40/50's (not that it really matters)

Stay exactly the way you are, and continue what you are doing, my lovely lady was dx when she was 49, 4 years ago, one daughter lives in London and at the time one was at Uni up north.

It's a shock, one daughter told her close friends, but found it pretty frustrating with the continual questioning that she decided to say that her Mom had been misdiagnosed, but that doesn't mean that she has remained exactly as she was and has shown what a lovely lady she has turned into.

Just hang in there, do what is best for you and tell your Mom to do the same for her. Life doesn't stop and be mindful of advice you receive, because that is just what it is .... advice ... not instruction.

Don't freak out .... treat yourself and your Mom as you always have. You will be surprised about how well things can work out. Don't focus on the negatives, everyone gets one run at life, sometimes it's tough and unfair and we always ask ourselves .... Why Me ? .... when it probably should be ... Why not me ?.

Be strong, laugh as much as you can at as much as you can. Your Mom will always be your Mom and stating the obvious .... Just be yourself ... It's been good enough so far so why change.

Keep smiling

:laughing:

#5
Thank you everyone. My mum is actually 65. she was misdiagnosed for the last 5 years. just frustrating. though the new meds are starting to work. It's nice to know that we are not the only ones going through this. I know she's just the same. actually shes been more herself since the new meds, like the old her. :smile:

#6
Hi, just wanted to support the advice that things change slowly, and in fact your mum has had this for years already - it's only the diagnosis that is sudden. And the diagnosis means they can start to treat it effectively; it sounds as though you've begun to experience this already. My husband was diagnosed thirteen years ago and is still doing a lot, travelling etc; effective treatments and physio have really made a huge difference. So the bottom line is to get on with uni and with life!

#7
Hi, I just feel so very sad because my husband who I love and adore dearly is worried that if he gives up work, or cuts his hours down then we won't have enough money to live on. I have the inherited type of PD and I first started showing symptoms in my mid to late teens, so I reckon I have had PD about 40 years.For a long time it was manageable with no real problems. In fact, I worked as a nurse until the powers that be decided I wasn't up to it , by this time i was married. I gave up work and went on to have 2 children, then I was divorced from my first husband. As my 2 children got older they tended to look after me, by shopping and helping with household chores etc. To cut a long story short. Some 20 years ago with my children grown up, I remarried . I have been married very happily to James for nearly 20 years, he has known from the start of our relationship that I had pd, and has always said that when the time came he would always take care of me. But he has a very good job with a good wage and is able to buy me anything I need to help me around the house etc. But the one thing I really want, and the one thing he is reluctant to give me is himself. He doesn't understand when I say I cannot cope by myself for ten hours a day , five days a week. He is worried that if he gives up work we won't have enough money to live on. In every other way he is kind , loving and a wonderful person. But, how do I make him understand that I need HIM, not all his hard earned money. He comes from a very proud family who have all worked hard all their lives. I said there were benefits he could claim.I am so sad. Please, can anyone help me,.