Divorce and PD


#1
I'm getting divorced, have three beautiful children, I'm 46, have PD and feel so frighten of being alone for the rest of my life.

#2
Hi, annie123! I'm also new to the forum, but I have already seen how helpful its members can be. Although I am 66 (to your young 46) and have no children at home, we are both newly single again. My husband always planned on being my caregiver when my PD advanced. Last February he was unexpectedly diagnosed with cancer; in May he passed away. It really is frightening to know you're on your own when you have a progressive illness. But so far, with the support of friends and my sister, I'm doing all right. Occasional visits with grandchildren pick up my spirits, too.

The responsibility of having children may turn out to be an asset. Caring for my 94-year-old mother often takes my focus off my case. Anyway, good luck with your new situation.

#3
There is just one thing that is worse than facing parky alone , and that is facing it with a resentful, grudging, unloving partner who wishes they could be free of you.

How old are your children? I have 4, they are all in their thirties, they have their own busy lives with jobs partners and children and none lives really close, but I know they love me and I am not alone. Neither are you. Take a deep breath and face it all, there are always people here, you are not alone.

#4
Hi Annie.

I am so sorry you find yourself in the situation of being alone with 3 children. My first husband was a nightmare,having numerous affairs etc. It was a relief in some respects when he left but I remember the fear of being on my own with three small children (2 4 and 6)with no money, loads of debt he had run up, no job etc. It was horrid to put it mildly and I didn't have PD at that time.

I have now been married for 22 years nearly to a lovely caring man, who loves me despite my PD (DX in 2011). We look after each other. All my children are grown up now and I have a great job that I love.

I still remember that awful feeling though.

I am thinking of you, Things can get better in time, life has a way of sorting itself out.

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#5
Hi Annie,

I have been thinking about you since I read your post about an hour ago. Divorce is difficult even when you are well.
I was divorced granted no children, and before PD dx but I can remember being in a black place for a while. However with the support of family and friends I came through the other side. Although I don't have children, it was helping with my nieces and nephews that helped me in the dark times as they showed unconditional love.

I hope you have a good family and friend network to help you at this difficult time.


Take care of yourself

Thinking of you x

#6
Hi Annie 123,

All I will say, have faith in your PD nurse/neuro. They are pretty good at knowing what type of drugs suit certain people and what doesn't. When I was diagnosed I had 2 fast growing children and going through a divorce ,, because HE couldn't cope. you will find it amazing how fast children adapt to a new situation.If you are not happy with any aspect of your meds don't be afraid to tell your PD nurse/neuro.

And most of all, Welcome to the Forum! If you need to know anything, there is always someone who can point you in the right direction.
My 'children are now 41 years old and 38 years old, and I have haD pd FOR 40 years, and we are all still thriving.

#7
HI all
Thank you for all your lovely comments. Had a great day today - sledging, snowball fights and making snowmen FANTASTICxx

#8
Hi Anne 123
I have twins 12 week early there 14 now,one is a girl with cp and diabetes in a wheelchair and the boy has aspergers etcwe also foster two kids.ive worked all my life and the wife told me when the kids are old enough she's gone.the amount of things going round in my head I've even consideredd ending it all.so I know how you feel you get set for your retirement and it's all going to be taken away from you.all you can dso is carry on worrying makes your pd life worse.all the best john

#9
Oh Potter,

That is so cruel,you will have that hanging over you for years as the children grow.

I think I would be inclined to ask her to leave now, at least it would be over and done with and you could move on.

Yes, it will be tough, but less painful than dragging it out, not knowing when she might leave you. Bit like pulling off a plaster in one go rather than picking it off a bit at a time.

Life is worth living and I think you are more likely to find peace and happiness without someone who is putting you through this torment.

Thinking of you

Caroline.