I am child-free, employed, single, middle-aged with parent who’s coped alone with PD for over 10 yrs.
A close friend/paid carer visited 2 mornings pw, + 1 hr a wk from an agency.
My PWP is funny, independent, sociable and skilled at concealment. This has enabled me to avoid taking responsibility e.g. learning about PD, finance, housing etc. Long-term discussions about moving to care home have suddenly accelerated and we have fallen out. 2 wks ago we agreed move late July to coincide with my work leave. I explained I’d strongly prefer this as it allows me as only child to show that I love PWP in what may be one of the last practical ways. PWP’s now admitted that was just to suit me and needs to move June as tired and unsafe. Care home can do but I am very sad because they can’t do weekends and weekdays so it will be someone else who takes PWP from home to be among strangers.
I suggested we could manage with more agency care, me at weekends and friends have offered to bring meals up until July date, but it’s a ‘no’ from PWP.
Not much anyone can advise on this but before it happens, surely I should be consulting various agencies? E.g. GP, Parkinson’s Nurse, social services, financial advisor…
Am feeling thoroughly incompetent, neglectful, selfish with a goodly helping of whinging self-pity today!
I love them so much and want to help but am not allowed time off work and it’s a 60 hr wk. Not so good to read on the forum that PWPs do better at home than in care… Getting more care at home has been rejected, as has setting up home together with carers coming in during day. I thought I had it all sorted with my ‘clever summer break plan’ but it blew up in my face!
Not firing on all cylinders as I am a poor organiser (dyspraxia) of my own stuff, long-term depression and lost only sib in accident early this year, not sorted the probate yet…
Is there any advice on how to organise thoughts and actions and above all put parent first and stop thinking of self?!