Hi, Suzy --
I just read your post this morning and was touched at several points. I understand the pain of watching a parent decline and lose the will to live. My father died of cancer at only 68, and from February of this year to September 23, the date of her death, I saw my mother slowly decline under the results of a series of strokes. But she was 95 and said in some lucid moments that she was ready to depart.
One thing that struck me as I was reading your post was that I may one day be in your father's shoes. I have had PD for 16 years and am doing fine, physically living the same life I always have. But when I hit the 20-year mark or 22-year or whatever, it could be that I, too, will suddenly take a downward turn. Now is the time to do what I want most to do (while I am able). I have long been aware of that and am currently planning a lot of travel. But what you caused me to see is that I should also be preparing myself mentally and emotionally (as well as one can) for the future.
You mentioned your son's assistance. I hope he continues to be of help and consolation, for the next generation is what most gives me hope. Every time I get a phone call or an email from my son or one of my young grandchildren, my outlook brightens.
Wishing you the best --