My Mum has been diagnosed for 4 or 5 years now, she’s 82. This year she has developed a lot more symptoms to the point where I think she could be described as in the advanced stage, or certainly a much more developed stage.
She is cared for by my Dad, I don’t live nearby but visit every other week. Its just them, they have no other support, which I think in itself is an issue. What I wanted to ask though is how best to respond to my Mum when she says things that are not rational. For example, she has just said on video chat when talking about her constant feelings that she needs to go to the toilet at night-time as ‘Its not just me though, the others are shouting to go too’. No-one other than my Dad lives with her, and its been that way for nearly 30 years.
As this is all new to us, we tend to question her, asking what she means and who else does she think is there. She usually remains silent. I don’t know if it upsets her to ask this, or confuses her, because tbh we can’t tell what her reactions are a lot of the time. What is the best way to respond to her? I think our current thinking is if we challenge her it will get her to think it through and realise she’s not making sense, but it doesn’t seem to help.
On the subject of support, she and my Dad have no outside support. They have a GP who they are only managing to get back into contact with due to lockdown and a Parkinson’s team that they have a meeting with every 6 months. GP tends to palm most things off as a PD issue and to speak to that team, we’ve also had it the other way round i.e. ‘that’s not PD, speak to your GP’. They are not getting enough support imo considering her symptoms are advancing and my Dad is on his own with her, with a heart condition. Can I ask what support people do tend to receive? Does this tend to be in the form of different specialist appointments (physio, occupational therapy) along with regular same nurse contact? How often should my Mum be seeing someone? Just need any sort of gauge to go by!
Many thanks for any advice