Lack of empathy....?


#1

Hiya

This is my first post, I wondered how other spouses are dealing with their husband/wife's condition? 

My husband,diagnosed 4yrs ago at age 44 has been on Ropinirol and clonazapam since diagnosis. He was on 12mg Ropinirol  each day, but this made him hyper sexual beyond belief. No longer pleasurable, just a desperate need, not caring that I am up at 6am everyday, working full time and caring for our two children as well as doing all the housework, cooking, shopping, cleaning etc.... He would wake me a any given time during the night and early on weekend mornings and then get really nasty when I knocked him back. It got to a point where I hated (still do) bedtime...each night an argument and an insult ringing in my ears (more exciting to be in bed with a dead person etc etc) 

His meds have been adjusted and he has been a bit better, but still not great. I have become unwell and am now on pills for stress, he seems incapable of seeing anything from anyone else's point of view and is short tempered and just not nice to be around to be honest. His arm is stiff and tremor not good, I have tried and tried to get him moving it, but he doesn't, has just become very adept with his other hand!! I have bought stress balls, hand exercises...but they remain unused in the cupboard, he is eating and drinking far too much and if I don't feel like sex he huffs and puffs, gets up and eats and drinks more all hours of the night, so he is always tired which doesn't help the condition. I do feel desperately sorry for him, this wasn't the future he had planned having worked hard and been very sensible with money all his life ready to enjoy a good and hopefully early retirement, and then this happens. He is still working, He's ok with the kids and seems ok with other people, it's just me he treats badly. Fortunately, I have a great job with lovely people and we have fab kids. Anyone else living like this??

 

 


#2

 

Hello LizT - I am so sorry that the Ropinirole has affected your OH in this way, unfortunately this is how it affects some PWP, but you should'nt have to put up with being treated the way you have been.  I think the best thing is to speak with hubbies neurologist and see if your OH can be weaned off Ropinirole  completely and be prescribed another drug in case things get worse. I myself take 18mg Ropinirole per day, but I am one of the extremely lucky ones where Ropinirole has not affected me in that way, but actually helped with my PD. Please speak to the parkinsons nurse also for support, don't deal with this on your own

Wish you all the best - Sheila


#3

Hi LizT, I have been down this road and it ended dreadfully.

Please take Shelfin's advice, speak to your neuro and/or  Parkinson's nurse.

Make it clear that you cannot live like this.

Your husband will fight to stay on the drug but can withdraw and move on to an alternative such as Sinemet.

Hopefully the Hypersexuality will vanish.

Do it now as it will only get worse.

Love

GG

 

 


#4

Thank you, I will. I am at the point of thinking about us separating, but that goes against every bone in my body. We have an appt this week with the consultant, sometime my OH lets me go with him, sometimes he says he doesn't want me to go as they listen to me and not him. If he says that this week, I will ring the Parkinsons Nurse and have a chat with her beforehand, she usually pops in on the appts as she knows things have been difficult. He already blames me for the fact they have reduced the Ropinirol and said that his tremor and stiffness is worse because of me. I just wonder really if it's the condition or the medication that's making him so unreasonable and unpleasant :-( xx


#5

 

I honestly believe it to be the meds if he wasn't like this before he was diagnosed LizT, I'm sure there are plenty of meds around for parkinsons, it's just trial and error with them as to which one will be suitable for your OH, we are all different as I said. It's sad to have to say that Goldengirl went through an awful time with her OH and they got through it but it was tough going and I admire her, she accepted help and you need to as well LizT, open up and say what Goldengirl said 'you can't go on like this'.

I hope that someone will take notice and take action over this big problem for your sake and your OH!

Best wishes and take care - Sheila


#6

I will do, thank you

Take care too 

xx