Learning to be a Carer


Hello,   I am a carer for my elderly mother who suffers from PD.  She was officially diagnosed in December 2015 but I am sure that she was suffering  from it 3 or so years earlier as she was showing the shaky symptoms but combined with a mini stroke, a spell in hospital, and moving to live with us, plus the fact that the Royal Mail put in her new address incorrectly into their computer and all her post went to another address, whose residents then returned to sender, a referral to see the PD consultant in 2012 was not followed up.  It was only when she saw the consultant last December that we were told about it.

Mother has been fairly well up to now, she was able to potter about, getting up, dressed, washed, making cups of tea etc, and I was mainly a part time carer.  However from November last year after she had a chest infection and a spell in hospital, 2 falls in December that her mobility has become quite bad.  From Monday this week her mobility has worsened, she is not able to walk very well, even with a trolley.  Her balance is bad, not  able to get up out of bed, get dressed, washed or get on the toilet, feeding is also very difficult for her.  The change has been a challenge for both of us as now I have to use a wheelchair to get her about to the bedroom/bathroom.  Yesterday whilst trying to get her into her chair, everything suddenly stopped working and she and trolley fell, luckily into her chair and she was not hurt at all, but both of us were shaken.

I am not a trained nurse or carer,  but have registered with our local carers association and booked onto a course for training in lifting and moving people with my son who helps me. 

We are self employed so I am able to multitask between our business and Mother but how do other members cope with both.  I am a member of our local PD branch who have been quite helpful and have coffee mornings with CAKE which does help!


Hi nearly60,

I'm sorry to hear that your Mother has been getting worse recently, this sounds like a difficult time for you both.

I'm sure other forum members will be able to offer some experiences of coping with both work and being a carer.  You might also find our Carer's booklet helpful? https://www.parkinsons.org.uk/content/carers-guide-carers-people-parkinsons

We also have a free peer support service, which puts you in touch with a trained volunteer who has a similar experience to you. Find out more about this service here: https://www.parkinsons.org.uk/content/our-peer-support-service

Best wishes,


(Digital team)


Hello Joanne,

Thank you for your very helpful reply, the peer support seems to be what I need at the moment.  I will certainly try it out.  Mother had a further relapse last night and just slumped whilst I was helping her change, I managed to get her back into bed, called 111, she was taken into A&E with a suspected infection but all tests were clear so brought her home.  The nurse who attended us said that she had to walk whilst she could otherwise she would loose the ability to walk.  Perhaps I was too forward when I obtained the wheelchair I do not know.  However this morning I made her walk despite her complaints otherwise, but she got there in the end. She is now eating her breakfast.


Hi nearly60,

Sorry that your Mother had a relapse last night, but it's good to know that she's better now and enjoying breakfast. If you or your mother need any more advice or support please do feel free to call our Helpline for a chat on 0808 800 0303. We are open from Monday-Friday: 9am-7pm and Saturday: 10am-2pm.

Best wishes,


Moderation Team