Motivation


#1
In comparative terms, my PD is still very minor. I was dx last month at 43 and apart from my right arm and fingers not doing what I tell them, sleepless nights and a really bad back no one would know I was ill. That's the trouble, I know that this will be as good as it gets and it's all downhill from here, I just don't know how steep the slope will be.

I'm on a bit of a downer but I'm half way through a degree that was meant to allow me to be a primary teacher and I keep thinking 'what's the point of wasting course fee's when, even if I get through the next 3-4 years study, who'll emply a Parky teacher aged nearly 50 above a fit person of any age?'. I now employers can't discriminate, but this is the real world not a Parliamentary soundbite.

Also, I feel guilty every time I moan about my bad back or the speed at which my hand won't do something in front of my wife. I feel like I'm letting her down or that she'll think it's me 'milking' it like I have 'man flu'. When i have tried to talk to her about the future, her take is very pragmatic but verges on the head in the sand such as, 'it may never get that bad so don't be so negative'.

I'm struggling with the desire and necessity to remain positive mixed with the realism of what PD actually will do to me.

Just sounding off.:frowning:

#2
you are in the same situation as someone who has had a death of a close family member. in this case the person is your expectation of yourself. it may take 2 or 3 years but you will come to terms.
you are lucky to have a strong pragmatic sensible parter.
don't be dictated to by your disease - fight it every way you can - don't expect to be defeated, because then you definitely will be. go for your dreams, you might win and if you lose, you lose honourably. have a look at the duadopa videos - people with 10 or 12 years of pd give a new lease of life perhaps for an additional 10 years - you only have 20 years to retirement, you might well be working till then. or you could assign yourself to the status of invalid now and give up.

your bad back can be fixed with medication, a firm bed (a foam underlay can help) and good setup for computers etc.

most of all accept your current depression and anxiety and understand it is temporary. keep fit, eat well, get the write meds and you will be standing in front of a class of 5 year olds before you know it.

keep strong

t

#3
right meds not write meds

B-

#4
:smile:
Hello digs, Your story is almost like reading my case history,I used to operate
heavy plant, and enjoyed utilizing my much cherished skills built up over 30yrs
there is something so satisfying about demolition excavating foundations loading
trucks and of course using 30ton machines with precision quickly gains respect and appreciation of your workmates, I wont go on about all that as I tend to get a
little angry,the sense of loss still burns. In 1999 it was taken by PD and DVLA
so I had no choice , I voluntarily gave up my car licence as my concentration also disappeared , all this made fedex a very dull boy .
Not one to feel sorry for myself to much I rediscovered old hobbies I really enjoy making models of Aircraft Ships Tanks, any thing at all I took up Photography again and this took me to old haunts I felt like a kid again, It has been hard at times to keep my head up as BLACKHEART was eroding my personality my strength and at times my will to go on,but you must fight and fight , remember the
Black Knight in Pythons hilarious Holy Grail, well you have to adopt the same tactics minus his arms and legs "tis but a scratch" such fortitude .
Python always makes me laugh and cheers my soul, and I have really kicked PARKYS
a...e with Duodopa this device is making such a difference to my life, I stil have
a bit to learn in order to make the most of it, and I still get very down, anyone
with PD suffers, my fellow contributor to this excellent forum Turnip has a wise
head , you could not obtain better advice from any source , but don't mention
The Ashes, must go now, remember the Black Knight.

Kindest Regards fedex

#5
Everyone has a different Parkinson's experience, but thought you might like to hear some optimism. My husband was diagnosed 10 years ago aged 31. He takes some meds, still works full time, although not for much longer. We have 2 little girls who keep us going. We have some days that are horrible and occasional days that give us a glimpse of the future - which I thinks helps to prepare ourselves. Yoga, physio and hydro therapy have helped, although my husband would rather be still able to play rugby. Life is good. We are lucky enough to have a Parkinsons nurse again and she is fab. I'm really proud of my husband, he hasnt run marathons or climbed mountains but he is just great at being him and has done his best. We are happier than most of our friends and we didnt expect to feel like this 10 years ago.

Big hugs to you and your wife - there will be better days - it isnt all down hill from here. Plus you can Q jump at theme parks!