Once Again
I was tired, I went to bed,
all those thoughts inside my head
So I got up again.
I sat awhile in the dark
and thought of you and that car park
So I wept again.
I got up and walked around
The World's the same but different
So I smiled again.
I was loved but now I feel numb
If I switch the light on she'll be gone
So I dream again.
I ask myself do I bore
she would say oh yes and much more
So I will shrink again.
I can hear our songs
The music tears at my insides
So I close my ears again
I have a wound, it will heal
It will take time, my love was real
So I will be, once again.
Bit of a numpty me. I havent quite got 
a handle on The Forum yet and it would appear that the above poem is in the wrong place.
It needs to be in the poetry section so will someone please tell me how to do that!
Sorry for being a twit!
a handle on The Forum yet and it would appear that the above poem is in the wrong place.It needs to be in the poetry section so will someone please tell me how to do that!
Sorry for being a twit!
Hi Mister Bogman, you in the wrong place?
Doubt that it matters, aint such a disgrace
I saw your poem, moved by what i read
Unlocked some memries, stored deep in my head
Mourning of loved ones, not easy to do
Those not affected have not got a clue
Hold on to memries of good, forget bad
Keep up your chin and try not to be sad
Speak from the heart, watched the pain in my brother
5 years since he lost significant other.
All the best Bogman
Carrot :)
Doubt that it matters, aint such a disgrace
I saw your poem, moved by what i read
Unlocked some memries, stored deep in my head
Mourning of loved ones, not easy to do
Those not affected have not got a clue
Hold on to memries of good, forget bad
Keep up your chin and try not to be sad
Speak from the heart, watched the pain in my brother
5 years since he lost significant other.
All the best Bogman
Carrot :)
PS: Bogman. To answer your Q. If you want to put your poems in Poetry thread, i believe the way you do it is to go to Forum home. Look through headings and find Creative Corner. Click on that and then look for Poetry Corner. Not 100% sure im right but think so!
Carrot
Carrot
Thank you carrot for in the pitch dark your help to see,
I will tell you something, it should be easy as can be
Mr Webman a small critique your links led me to sorrow
You're only as good as the worst so make it easy to follow !!
Seriously I am one of the third type of people insofar as I do not always read the instructions nor do I learn by observation. I usually learn by peeing on the electric fence and this is a point in question.
I will tell you something, it should be easy as can be
Mr Webman a small critique your links led me to sorrow
You're only as good as the worst so make it easy to follow !!
Seriously I am one of the third type of people insofar as I do not always read the instructions nor do I learn by observation. I usually learn by peeing on the electric fence and this is a point in question.
It appers I have started something called a thread and as there is nothing I can do to change that I have decided to continue wiyh it.The theme is Poems of love and loss. Mine are schoolboy utterances but I am willling to learn.
THE LONG GOODBYE.
I know I can live without you because I did before we met
we had good times together and those I'll not regret
I suppose what really happened , there were too many lies
So we'll put some time between us until the pain subsides
You said you really loved me, so why did you treat me unkind
You moved on so quickly no look back at what was left behind
You cannot keep on doing this, it's irresponsible and wrong
Good hearts are precious , it's not just the words to a song
It feels like I am walking through a cloud that's made of pain
some would say that this kind of love is always made in vain
One minute we'd been laughing I'd read you a funny line
then I saw it in your eyes that refused to look in mine
This time I know it's over, that there's no way back to you
And even if I begged you'd still say that we are through
Though this old heart is broken and inside I'm beat and crying
i will always remember you and how once you took me flying.
THE REPLY
She stopped me then and said you’re not the only one crying here
How dare you say those things, you’re not the only one who cares
You got no God given rights, what if you had walked away?
I have to protect my children and listen to what they say.
Take heed now and listen, this love was never going anywhere
After all you are a married man you always came to me in fear
Please believe me it wasn’t easy but I was made to choose
It’s not as if a coin was flipped, heads I win, tails you lose.
THE LONG GOODBYE.
I know I can live without you because I did before we met
we had good times together and those I'll not regret
I suppose what really happened , there were too many lies
So we'll put some time between us until the pain subsides
You said you really loved me, so why did you treat me unkind
You moved on so quickly no look back at what was left behind
You cannot keep on doing this, it's irresponsible and wrong
Good hearts are precious , it's not just the words to a song
It feels like I am walking through a cloud that's made of pain
some would say that this kind of love is always made in vain
One minute we'd been laughing I'd read you a funny line
then I saw it in your eyes that refused to look in mine
This time I know it's over, that there's no way back to you
And even if I begged you'd still say that we are through
Though this old heart is broken and inside I'm beat and crying
i will always remember you and how once you took me flying.
THE REPLY
She stopped me then and said you’re not the only one crying here
How dare you say those things, you’re not the only one who cares
You got no God given rights, what if you had walked away?
I have to protect my children and listen to what they say.
Take heed now and listen, this love was never going anywhere
After all you are a married man you always came to me in fear
Please believe me it wasn’t easy but I was made to choose
It’s not as if a coin was flipped, heads I win, tails you lose.
80 people have read the first poem but only one left a comment. I would prefer criticism rather than be ignored because I cannot learn from the latter,
Tell it like it is!!
Heal me.
God give me some words
To help heal my soul
Grant me grace and peace
Restore me once more
I am so lost and lonely
I need the time to heal
Give me some serenity
Let me once more feel
There’s a void a black hole
I must have fallen in
With the wonder of a child
I’m all at sea again.
Please don’t let me see her
I don’t want to see her smile
All I need is to be elsewhere
And leave her far behind.
I’m travelling in my mind
I don’t take it for granted.
For a while there it was real
The love I always wanted,
If ever she should ask of me
Tell her that I’m long gone
Say I left for who knows where
All you have is this old song
God give me some words
To help heal my soul
Grant me grace and peace
Restore me once more
I am so lost and lonely
I need the time to heal
Give me some serenity
Let me once more feel
There’s a void a black hole
I must have fallen in
With the wonder of a child
I’m all at sea again.
Please don’t let me see her
I don’t want to see her smile
All I need is to be elsewhere
And leave her far behind.
I’m travelling in my mind
I don’t take it for granted.
For a while there it was real
The love I always wanted,
If ever she should ask of me
Tell her that I’m long gone
Say I left for who knows where
All you have is this old song
Response to poetry? ErrrrrMMMMMmmmmmmm!
To be honest I don't feel comfortable responding to other people's poems because they can be very personal things and I can't criticise those who try to express their feelings in this way, especially when PD might be involved.
I liked your poem (the last one, above)and could identify with some of your sentiments.
I have been called the 'poet from Hell' which made me take stock for a while. However, I like writing so will continue to do so - comments or no. I hope you will do the same - continue writing, I mean.
All the best
x
To be honest I don't feel comfortable responding to other people's poems because they can be very personal things and I can't criticise those who try to express their feelings in this way, especially when PD might be involved.
I liked your poem (the last one, above)and could identify with some of your sentiments.
I have been called the 'poet from Hell' which made me take stock for a while. However, I like writing so will continue to do so - comments or no. I hope you will do the same - continue writing, I mean.
All the best
x
ps
Your last verse is reminiscent of Del Amitri (I think).
Your last verse is reminiscent of Del Amitri (I think).
Bogman
Heal me is beautiful
x JC
Heal me is beautiful
x JC
Hi Lin,
I am a muso that I do admit but I do not possess any Delamitri in my 3200 songs on my Ipod.
I now know how George Harrison stumbled in "My Sweet Lord" which he thought was an original melody and then found out he had plagiarised "he's so fine " by the Chiffons!
With my simple rhymes it is always likely that you borrow from one song or another!!
I will be checking Delamitri lyrics on line until I find the connection.
Thank you for taking the time to comment but I do know what you mean with regards to being asked to critique so I am going to stop asking !!
I am a muso that I do admit but I do not possess any Delamitri in my 3200 songs on my Ipod.
I now know how George Harrison stumbled in "My Sweet Lord" which he thought was an original melody and then found out he had plagiarised "he's so fine " by the Chiffons!
With my simple rhymes it is always likely that you borrow from one song or another!!
I will be checking Delamitri lyrics on line until I find the connection.
Thank you for taking the time to comment but I do know what you mean with regards to being asked to critique so I am going to stop asking !!
Hi JC,
Thank you for your most welcome comment. I have decided to continue this thread and I hope to add more poems a love affair starting at the end and working back to the initial contact. It will take some time but I am currently ahead of the game so I hope you will drop by occasionally and check it out !!!
Thank you for your most welcome comment. I have decided to continue this thread and I hope to add more poems a love affair starting at the end and working back to the initial contact. It will take some time but I am currently ahead of the game so I hope you will drop by occasionally and check it out !!!
The Del Amitri song you are looking for is Tell Her This - I love it.
It starts like this...
Tell her not to go
I ain't holding on no more
Tell her something in my mind freezes up from time to time
and I like this verse....
Tell her the chips are down
I drank to much shouted it out loud
Tell her something in my heart needs her more than even clowns
need the laughter of the crowd
Lin
x
It starts like this...
Tell her not to go
I ain't holding on no more
Tell her something in my mind freezes up from time to time
and I like this verse....
Tell her the chips are down
I drank to much shouted it out loud
Tell her something in my heart needs her more than even clowns
need the laughter of the crowd
Lin
x
Love on the rebound, beware what you do
That which feels perfect sometimes wont ring true
Hurting and vunerable, heart full of pain
Some take advantage for own personal gain
Have I been stupid, or praps just naive?
Wanted some comfort, to soothe while I grieve
Jumped from the frying pan into the fire
Driven by need to feel love and desire
Those on the rebound dont listen to head
Ignore gut feelings to fill lonely bed
Dont stop to listen when they are in need
This is a lesson ive learned, please take heed!
Best to have no-one than more hurt and pain
Stuck in a cycle that comes round again
Take your time choosing a partner for you
Leave the familiar and find something new
Build up some trust and hear your inner soul
You may be lucky and fulfill your goal
Even if not, you are best off alone
Than sharing a lifetime in unhappy home.
Poem dedicated to a couple of exes!
Wiser Carrot!
That which feels perfect sometimes wont ring true
Hurting and vunerable, heart full of pain
Some take advantage for own personal gain
Have I been stupid, or praps just naive?
Wanted some comfort, to soothe while I grieve
Jumped from the frying pan into the fire
Driven by need to feel love and desire
Those on the rebound dont listen to head
Ignore gut feelings to fill lonely bed
Dont stop to listen when they are in need
This is a lesson ive learned, please take heed!
Best to have no-one than more hurt and pain
Stuck in a cycle that comes round again
Take your time choosing a partner for you
Leave the familiar and find something new
Build up some trust and hear your inner soul
You may be lucky and fulfill your goal
Even if not, you are best off alone
Than sharing a lifetime in unhappy home.
Poem dedicated to a couple of exes!
Wiser Carrot!
Hi Bogman. Count on it
Brave words Carrot - excellent poem.
Lin
Lin
Wiser Carrot, beautiful carrot but better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all!!
Below is not really a poem more a ditty. I love music but cannot play a note. I love dancing but have no rythmn. I love singing but go of key at the drop of a hat. Having said all that I do all of them and will continue to do so until I am surrounded by wood!!
ITS OVER
You looked at me and
I looked at you
We had both enjoyed our moment
But its come and gone
Now you have travelled on
Your pain is there for
All to see
But it won’t last long
IT’S OVER
You can tell me your lies
And you can hide your sighs
But I have heard the whispers
The word is out there is no doubt
You’re in love with someone else
IT’S OVER
So baby I am history
Well tomorrow is a mystery
I will start my new life from today
yesterdays news will become
tomorrows tunes
to be picked from the
ether and played
as a soft melody or
a memory
of you and me
IT’S OVER
Below is not really a poem more a ditty. I love music but cannot play a note. I love dancing but have no rythmn. I love singing but go of key at the drop of a hat. Having said all that I do all of them and will continue to do so until I am surrounded by wood!!
ITS OVER
You looked at me and
I looked at you
We had both enjoyed our moment
But its come and gone
Now you have travelled on
Your pain is there for
All to see
But it won’t last long
IT’S OVER
You can tell me your lies
And you can hide your sighs
But I have heard the whispers
The word is out there is no doubt
You’re in love with someone else
IT’S OVER
So baby I am history
Well tomorrow is a mystery
I will start my new life from today
yesterdays news will become
tomorrows tunes
to be picked from the
ether and played
as a soft melody or
a memory
of you and me
IT’S OVER
No sleep tonight at all so I decided to put anothe one on.Originally the first word of each observation was highlighted in black so if you read it downwards it spelt out " She is no longer mine"
The Selfish Song
She’s out with some other guy
I don’t like it
She’s telling me good bye
I don’t like it
She has a way with men
I don’t like it
Is he holding her in his arms
I don’t like it
Is he kissing her on the neck
I don’t like it
Is he lying on his back
I don’t like it
It’s two in the morning
She’s not home I don’t like it
No text nothing
You’d thought she’d phone I don’t like it
No need to tell me twice
She’s gone I don’t like it
No more tomorrow
There’s only yesterday I don’t like it
Longer. I thought it woulda
Lasted longer I don’t like it
Longer no longer
There will be no anger I don’t like it
Longer , I long for her
I long for her I don’t like it
Mine is a selfish song
I don’t like it
The Selfish Song
She’s out with some other guy
I don’t like it
She’s telling me good bye
I don’t like it
She has a way with men
I don’t like it
Is he holding her in his arms
I don’t like it
Is he kissing her on the neck
I don’t like it
Is he lying on his back
I don’t like it
It’s two in the morning
She’s not home I don’t like it
No text nothing
You’d thought she’d phone I don’t like it
No need to tell me twice
She’s gone I don’t like it
No more tomorrow
There’s only yesterday I don’t like it
Longer. I thought it woulda
Lasted longer I don’t like it
Longer no longer
There will be no anger I don’t like it
Longer , I long for her
I long for her I don’t like it
Mine is a selfish song
I don’t like it
The ing song.
Oh the madness and the sadness of what we’ve been through
The hiding and the lying of being in love with you
All the dreaming and the scheming have all come to nought
So it’s crying and it’s sighing , spare me a kindly thought
We’ve been running and been jumping on each others bones
We’ve been flying and sky diving dangerous when left alone
We’ve been landing and been standing , I even heard you moan
I’ve been wondering and a pondering the words for my gravestone
Oh the madness and the sadness , they haven’t got a clue
The caring and the sharing, somehow I’ll get to you
We been fizzing and been popping and it’s time for you to go
So leave me now my Darling I have never loved you more.
Oh the madness and the sadness of what we’ve been through
The hiding and the lying of being in love with you
All the dreaming and the scheming have all come to nought
So it’s crying and it’s sighing , spare me a kindly thought
We’ve been running and been jumping on each others bones
We’ve been flying and sky diving dangerous when left alone
We’ve been landing and been standing , I even heard you moan
I’ve been wondering and a pondering the words for my gravestone
Oh the madness and the sadness , they haven’t got a clue
The caring and the sharing, somehow I’ll get to you
We been fizzing and been popping and it’s time for you to go
So leave me now my Darling I have never loved you more.