First of all I would just like to say hello everyone, I have just joined the forum in hope to find others who can support and understand the way I feel.
My story involves my beloved grandfather who turned eighty years old back in February. He was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease three years ago, however he has got progressively worse since his diagnosis. He has a variety of symptoms such as arm tremors, hallucinations from medication etc... and in January earlier this year he was also diagnosed with Parkinson's Dementia.
Until quite recently he was having a range of good days and bad days but now they are mostly bad days. I find myself feeling quite upset and really angry. I sat down and figured the reason for this is because I can't quite come to terms with everything that is going on. Obviously I understand what happens to him but what is frustrating me is I am unsure how to behave around him.
I absolutely hate it, but I find myself feeling awkward at times as I am so unsure and not very confident on how to respond when his symptoms happen in my presence. It has been hard for all of the family but I feel my mother, my auntie and my brother are better than me at conversing with him when he feels unwell, as I am finding it even harder to cope and get my head around it all. I am so frustrated and upset. I went to see him today and I came home and just broke down.
I need to find a way to let go of the anger I feel, and coming to terms with his declining condition but I'm not sure how.
Sorry to ramble...