My hubby diagnosed 2017 has increasing awful mood. He can get quite aggressive and nasty. He says I take things too personally and I am paranoid. I can’t cope at the moment. It has resulted in me thinking I will always love him but now I am not in love with him. I feel so trapped. We have been married 33years. Not an option for me to leave. He just won’t listen.
Hi Pigeon,
We are sorry to hear about your husband’s recent changes. While we encourage you to contact his medical/Parkinson’s team as soon as possible to alert them, we also have a free and confidential helpline staffed with friendly, knowledgeable advisors who are ready to listen and offer options – including local resources – to make things easier for both of you. They are on 0808 800 0303 and, as many forum members can attest, are genuinely happy to be of help, however they can.
With our warmest wishes,
Jason
Forum Moderator
Hello @Pigeon360 sorry to hear about your husband. I wonder if it could be his medication making him worse? Contact his PD nurse and explain what is going on.
Hello Pigeon
I can certainly identify with this feeling. Knowing what I do now several years down the line I would approach your GP, if you can get hold of him/her and ask for support . You may be able to get telephone counselling to address your very understandable feelings. Just check you are registered as a carer at your surgery. Alternatively Carers UK can offer counselling and a safe environment to vent.
Additionally I would talk to you PD specialist nurse as it sounds as if your husband is depressed. The old phrase” You always hurt those you love the most” springs to mind and is always relevant in these situations.
There is no reason to accept being used as a whipping boy for his obvious frustrations and he needs to respect you as a person in your own right. I would tell him how much he has hurt you and the help you feel you need to keep going
Hopefully you can both access the support you both need and can get back on a more even keel. This may well be a phase and part of the grieving process for his old life and for yours too.
Take very great care xx
Hi Pigeon, I feel your pain. My husband was diagnosed 10yrs ago aged 45 and the last few months he had become really unpleasant to be around. He barely speaks and when he does it’s to moan, complain, or just make a nasty comment. We’re 22yrs married and I don’t want to leave either but I have to say I am really struggling with him and having issues with anxiety myself. Gosh, it’s hard isn’t it. Make sure to make some time for yourself, I escape to our study and make resin jewellery - that’s my time when I don’t have to think about it all! Take care x