My old buddy Mr Parkinsons has opened his box of tricks( did you notice the respect there) I have been trying to get him onside in other words,, instead of clashing heads every 5mins I have been trying to befriend and placate him, I have been trying for 48 hrs22mins,,aaaannnd30 seconds, and you know what, you know so very what ,IT WAS A COMPLETE WASTE OF FLIPPING, !!!!??G time ,I have slightly lowered my dopa intake so he would be more comfy inside my head, I thought if he could get his feet up on his favourite cooch, sorry coooch only applies to our Geordie readers, of which there are 3 and Im one of them, get his feet up and watch Sri Lanka v England,,, ehhh no wrong choice, ok England v Ecuador,, OK, OK yes I know,well sit and watch In the Night Garden followed by the Telly Tubbies, with a brand spanking new bottle of GlenKinchie a bucket of ice cubes ,yes that hit the spot he is becoming less aggressive, and the tingling in my fingers and toes has gone, oh and I can stretch, its working my efforts are finaly taming, I know finaly is spelt rang,,thats another geordie word meaning wrong, ,,as I said finaly is spelt wrong but who really cares when he has relaxed his grip, when you are free you can move around the house with ease, easily walking into door frames and dropping piping hot tea on my wifes newly cleaned coooch, tripping up and falling painfully but luckily without breaking bones ,at least that last example amuses the trainee thugs and muggers who ominously hang around the alley where my friend was attacked a while back, it always makes them fall about laughing, oh where is the deadly accurate forked lightning when you need it,,,? forked lightning, you have to take care when writing forked lightning, especially whe HE IS watching, my Mother lives 100.262mtrs from our house, not far that , my record for falling down in that distance is 4 times, almost 5 but a white van man ran into me and nudged me upright, my left arm is black and blue as a result, but amazingly the bruising has taken on the shape of a SHORT SUNDERLAND FLYING BOAT so I am quite pleased. now where was I ,,,/???????oh yes parky has decided to give me a new, well 2 new potentialy,, yes yes I know its spilt rang harmful effects double vision, and incontinence if you imagine going for a jimmy, and there are not one but two targets, and even on occasion three, GREAT THANKS MATE, THATS JUST WHAT I NEED , also I can go for ages without feeling the need to go, and that applies to both functions if you get my drift, which is good, but then bang I must find a dunny within 30 seconds or I am in the,,,/////t ,so there you have the latest report from FEDS WAR,,coning to you from a pockmarked shell holed minefield hat is my brain, the gloves are off I am refuelled and rearmed I have pressed the boost button on Ddopa ,wish me luck here we go again.
Hope you are all well or wells if there are more than one of you
WingcoFEDMY BROS NICKED MY RAYBANS