Hello all, my first post here on the forum and hoping to get some advice. My 89 year old father has advanced Parkinson’s and also dementia. Since he was diagnosed six years ago, he refused (and still does) to accept that he has Parkinson’s. Says the doctors are talking nonsense…
He is housebound which in turn, means my mother is also housebound as she does the majority of caring for him.
In the last 6 months, he has progressively got worse and announced one day that everyone was trying to poison him and since then has refused to take his meds.
He is supposed to take 3 Madopar tablets daily but will only have 1 and refuses point blank to have his Neupro patches again. In turn, his symptoms of both Parkinson’s and dementia have come on in force.
I love my Dad but he has turned into a nasty, spiteful, bad-tempered man. He doesn’t like anything or anyone and he rants and rages at my poor mother about absolutely anything on a daily basis. And goes on and on and on and on… It is just relentless and anything can set him off. In the last couple of weeks he has now started making up stories about the neighbours in the street and wanting to call the police to have their houses demolished. If it wasn’t so sad, it would be funny.
There is absolutely no reasoning with him, we have tried to explain how good the tablets are for him but he doesn’t care. The doctor and also the specialists at the hospital have also spoken to him and he just tells them they don’t know what they are talking about and they should leave him alone. So they have. I have asked the local doctor again to please speak to my Dad but he said there is no point and it’s better to leave it.
Easier said than done when you’re not the person having to live with him.
Unfortunately I live abroad so cannot get back as often as I would like but I would love to know if any of you have any tips on how to best try and deal with this.
If only we could get him back on his patches, I’m positive he would respond well to them again.
Hi FeeBee,
What you are describing are classic unfortunate symptoms of dementia.
Like Parkinson’s, every dementia sufferer is different but I do know from experience, you cannot reason with them. To your father, what he is experiencing is very real.
The best thing I found was to divert their attention rather than confront them.
Music from his younger years and get some DVDs of old musicals. That seems to work for many sufferers.
The most important thing to know is what you are seeing is not him, the old dad will appear at times and make the most of it when that happens.
Sorry I couldn’t be more reassuring.
Jim
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